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Whose Wedding Is It Anyway?

I bet that you heard the following statements relating to weddings:

  • Bridal Show - Where wedding professionals, vendors and service providers present their goods and services.
  • Bridal Shower - Where brides are showered with gifts.
  • Bridal Party - The title given family members and wedding attendants.
  • Bridal Chorus - Music traditionally played at the ceremony.
  • Bridal Accessories - Accessories needed for the ceremony and reception.

One could think that the wedding is just for the bride.

So, where does the groom fit in?

In the past, tradition called for the bride and her family to plan, and be responsible for the wedding. The groom and his family were often, but not always, asked to participate in specific aspects such as: Flowers for the bride, the mothers, the groom and male attendants, Music and the Officiant.

Times, they are changing!

The traditional family of "Leave it to Beaver" where the man worked out of the house, supporting the family while the wife stayed home caring for the home and the children is reserved to too few families.

Today, both men and women work, earning a living and sharing responsibilities for the home and the children. It has become commonplace for men to shop, do housework and care for their children. In fact the term "House Husband" no longer sounds strange.

More and more brides and grooms live together prior to marriage.

The traditional responsibility of the bride's parents to plan and fulfill their daughter's dream wedding has shifted. Today, a majority of the working brides and grooms pay all, or a large percentage of the wedding costs.

Another change in the wedding scene is the large number of brides and grooms who have been married before. Their weddings may include children.

So, who's wedding is it anyway?

The bride's and the groom's of course.

Quite frequently, it is recognized not only with engagement parties for both but also with wedding showers where both bride and groom are showered with gifts.

Though there are still some aspects specific to brides or grooms, they should plan their big day together. It is important that each of them bears the responsibility and commitment to their relationship as a soon to be a married couple, preparing for their wedding day. It is also an important judge as to how comfortable with, and yielding to each other the bride and groom are.

Today's grooms are just as excited as their brides at the prospect of their upcoming marriage. They do not want to be guests at their own wedding. Rather, they want to be active participants in planning their wedding and honeymoon with their brides. They want to contribute financially, they want their opinions considered and they want to be involved in the decision making. Working as a team planning the wedding, gives the bride and groom a wonderful opportunity to dream together, share their thoughts, plan together and have the wedding of their dream. All the while, sharing the excitement, fun and occasional disagreements and resolutions, associated with wedding planning and later, with married life.

Working together brings the bride and groom closer together as they learn more and more about each other, and is a good beginning to later, jointly plan their life together.

We have seen the trend gaining momentum, as brides often ask A-wedding Day how to involve their grooms in planning their wedding. We have also noticed a dramatic increase in the number of men purchasing not only jewelry and gifts, but wedding accessories for the ceremony and reception.

You plan to share your life as a couple, you owe it to both of you to plan your wedding as a couple. You'll enjoy a rewarding experience, the memories of which will last a lifetime.

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